A weekend in Bama...

We spent the weekend in Alabama. We had decided to use our Easter break to visit Greta’s sister, Nancy, who lives in Birmingham. Here are some highlights and some lowlights of our trip to Alabama and all places in between.

-For my birthday, a few weeks ago, Nancy sent me a t-shirt that simply says “Alabama” across the chest. This is the “officially licensed apparel” of the University of Alabama. I was stoked. I even saved it so that the first wearing of the shirt would take place while we were in ‘Bama. Alabama is football crazy and a pretty divided state. Alabama and Auburn are each in the state and the allegiances people have to one or the other run deep and often back through a number of generations. The Alabama Crimson Tide and the Auburn Tigers do not play well together. This is all back story so that you can properly understand what follows.

While spending a gorgeous Saturday afternoon in the Birmingham Zoo, Greta, Nancy and I were enjoying the animals. I was proudly sporting my Alabama t-shirt. We had just left the alligator swamp and were bound for the primates when this old man—probably in his 70’s—walked by. As he passed us he looked at me and yelled, “Roll Tide!” This was the single greatest moment of my time at the zoo. This old man, otherwise calm and cool, just couldn’t resist the opportunity to commiserate with a fellow ‘Bama Backer. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I’m a UCLA fan from California. He’s better off not knowing.

-We attended a Southern Baptist Easter service. Another new experience for me. The music was great and the message was well crafted. Overall, it was a very enjoyable experience, but I was disappointed that there was only one altar call and no potluck.

-We got to visit Nancy at work. She works at the American Village, just outside of Birmingham. She serves as a historic interpreter and the queen of all stitching for this endeavor in which 18th century Boston has been recreated. School children from all over the greater Birmingham area come to learn about the causes of the Revolutionary War and the characteristics of the colonists who dared to separate from the Crown. We had a great time sitting in a recreation of the Old North Church as Nancy delivered a secret spy message. I thought about turning her in to General Gage, but then realized that such an act might lead to the spread of cricket in the States. Out of a deep love for my fellow Americans, I sat still.

-We attended a Birmingham Barons baseball game on Sunday night. If you’ve never gone to a minor league baseball game, you’re missing out. We sat on the lower level for $8 a piece and have fun trying to catch t-shirts, Frisbees and other such objects that were tossed into the crowd between innings. The players all play hard, knowing that their ticket to AAA depends on it. I even adopted a player into my heart—Wally Rosa, catcher for the Barons, who, as best I can tell, still doesn’t have a hit this season. This must change! If you think about it, send Wally some good mental vibes. His season depends on you!

-On the drive home, we decided that we were going to eat at a Hardee’s or Carl’s Jr. This proved problematic as there are, and we can firmly attest to this, no Hardee’s or Carl’s Jr. restaurants anywhere along I-20 through Mississippi or Louisiana. We saw myriad Wendy’s and McDonald’s, but when you’ve got your heart set on Carl’s, how can you settle? Settle we did not. And a mere five hours after first mentioning our hunger and our desire for Famous Stars, we pulled in to Carl’s Jr. in Van, Texas. Good things do indeed come to those who wait. Like indigestion from eating a Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger, onion rings, criss-cut fries and two root beers.

-Alabama is a very pretty state. The green hills and plentiful countryside remind me of a painting I saw in Los Angeles once. Louisiana and Mississippi, however, not pretty. And since they rudely stand in the way of anyone wanting to travel from Texas to Alabama, we were forced to endure them. These two states are tied in the “Most Disgusting Bathrooms in the Known World” contest that I initiated while on this trip. Who would have thought that filthy, disgusting and smoke-filled gas stations would have filthy, disgusting and smoke-filled bathrooms. Probably not coincidentally, my wife is sick today.